MERCY

	WHEN TO GIVE UP A RELATIONSHIP

The Gospel

JOHN 4:16-19

Jesus said to [the Samaritan woman], "Go, call your husband, and then come back here." "I have no husband," replied the woman. "You are right in saying you have no husband!" Jesus exclaimed. "The fact is, you have had five and the man you are living with now is not your husband. What you said is true." "Sir," answered the woman, "I can see you are a prophet."

The Media -- "Mercy" (Shawn Mendes)

"Please have mercy on me. Even though you don’t mean to hurt me, you keep tearing me apart. I’m not asking for a lot—just that you’re honest with me. I’m a puppet on your strings, and even though you got good intentions, I need you to set me free. Consuming all the air inside my lungs, I’m prepared to sacrifice my life."

It is clear over and over again in the Scriptures that Jesus knew human nature. And he could easily read what people were doing and thinking. So, as he visited with the person that we have come to call the "Samaritan woman," Jesus knew that she had problems. Not only were there moral problems with multiple love relationships, but he determined that she was hurting herself with the way she was living. Consequently, in a direct way, he tells her that things should change in her life.

Often we allow our actions to harm us and we do not even realize it. In Shawn Mendes' song "Mercy," the man in the relationship knows that his girlfriend is far from what she should be. But he does not want to admit it. He would even sacrifice his life, he sings, than give up the harmful relationship. That may prove to be exactly what happens in such a situation. Maybe not in a physical way, but certainly in a psychological way.

Sometimes we simply must admit that a relationship just will not work out, no matter how much we want it. Certainly, there is a chance that every relationship can work out because of the way our human desires work, but when we receive strong messages that the opposite will happen, we must take notice. What we want often dictates our actions, and many times what we want should not happen.

Therefore, we simply must face the objective facts. We should force ourselves to ask questions like: is the other in the relationship honestly trying as hard as I am to make this work? Is he/she as interested as I am? And so forth. And if we find that the answers are unsettling, maybe we should just move on in our lives.

PRAYER

Good and gracious God, it is so difficult to understand our emotions and desires. Give us the grace to discern well the different feelings that we have as we work with the relationships in our lives. Be with us, we pray.

+++++

GUIDE FOR CLASSROOM PRESENTATION AND PERSONAL ENRICHMENT

Theme: We must give up a relationship that is hurting us.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
1. Using your imagination, what do you consider the principal problem of the "Samaritan woman" in the Gospel?
2. It is clear that in Jesus' times, there were questions that dealt with divorce, etc. Why do you think Jesus was not in favor of divorce?
3. Text analysis: The man in the relationship is asking for honesty. Do you believe that most couples are honest with their partner in the relationship? Yes or no and why?
4. Text analysis: "I'm a puppet on your strings." What is the meaning of the sentence?
5. In general, why do people in relationships hold on to a relationship when it is clear that it is failing?
6. Why is human nature so difficult to control?
7. Given the situation of the song, what must happen in order for the couple to resolve the relationship?
8. Why is it so difficult to give up a relationship that has developed over a longer period of time?
9. Obtain a copy of the video to the song, and study how it corresponds to the words of the song.
10. What does the song "Mercy" teach young people?

Questions, comments? Let me know. Email Fr. Mike