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	THE HOPELESS LOVE

The Gospel

JOHN 8:3-11

The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery and made her stand in the middle. They said to [Jesus], "Teacher, this woman was caught in the very act of committing adultery. Now in the law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?" They said this to test him, so that they could have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and began to write on the ground with his finger. But when they continued asking him, he straightened up and said to them, "Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." Again he bent down and wrote on the ground. And in response, they went away one by one, beginning with the elders. So he was left alone with the woman before him. Then Jesus straightened up and said to her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" She replied, "No one sir." Then Jesus said, "Neither do I condemn you. Go, and from now on do not sin any more."

The Media -- "We Found Love" (Rihanna)

On Rihanna's album which contains the song "We Found Love,", the lady in the relationship begins the song with the statement of the problem: "It’s like you’re screaming, and no one can hear. You almost feel ashamed that someone could be that important; that, without them, you feel like nothing. No one will ever understand how much it hurts. And when it’s over, you almost wish that you could have all that bad stuff back so that you could have the good." The lyrics say the same thing a little more poetically: "Yellow diamonds in the light. Now we’re standing side by side, as your shadow crosses mine, what it takes to come alive. It’s the way I’m feeling, I just can’t deny, but I’ve gotta let it go. We found love in a hopeless place."

Without too much imagination, the woman caught in sin as recorded in John's Gospel could be the lady in Rihanna's song "We Found Love." As the person in the song, perhaps she had found temporary love, but it was not good for her. It made her feel empty, like she was screaming, but no one could hear her. She and her lover felt good in the heat of the moment, but she knew that she had to let the relationship go. She had found love, but the situation was hopeless.

And further, transitioning to the Gospel story, she had been caught. Her sin was known by others, and she should have been condemned to death. She is thrown by her accusers at the feet of Jesus who recognizes her desire to change and that she has let the immorality pass. Jesus condemns the sin, but forgives her, because he recognizes the hope he sees for her future.

There are some relationships that human beings allow to develop in their lives that are not healthy. A couple may involve themselves too much in physical feelings. Or they may try to enhance their lives with some type of chemical or too much alcohol stimulation. Or perhaps their relationship just is not making them feel better about who they are or what they have become. They find themselves in Rihanna's words "in a hopeless place." Those relationships should cease because they are not relationships that are life-giving.

For a relationship to be life-giving, it must bring about a wonderful feeling to be sure, but it must be of substance as well. It must make both people in the relationship stronger in their understanding of themselves so that they can truly choose each other, that is, freely and with meaningful thought. Ultimately, the relationship must be based on true love which is primarily the ability to truly care about the other. Only then can the relationship be healthy.

PRAYER

Good and gracious God, when your Son gave us his doctrine of love, man and woman as a couple played a big part. You want us to have happy and healthy relationships. Give us the grace to work for the very best in all of our relationships. Be with us, we pray.

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GUIDE FOR CLASSROOM PRESENTATION AND PERSONAL ENRICHMENT

Theme: Some relationships are not healthy, and should be abandoned.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
1. Adultery was looked upon as a grave sin in Old Testament times. Do people consider it a grave sin today? Yes or no and why? See Catechism of the Catholic Church, second edition, numbers 2380-2381.
2. Project: make a presentation on the virtue of chastity as contained in the Catechism, numbers 2337-2359.
3. In your opinion, what is the meaning of Jesus' writing on the ground?
4. Text analysis: "No one will ever understand how much it hurts." True or false and why?
5. What are the strongest indications that a relationship is not a healthy one?
6. In general, do you think that there is too much physical sharing of each other among young people? Yes or no and why?
7. Do you believe that our society is too "promiscuous"? Why or why not?
8. Do you think that alcohol has a place in a love relationship? Yes or no and why?
9. In your opinion, describe a "life-giving" relationship.
10. The meditation mentions that true love can be defined in terms of "caring" for another. What are some other fundamental characteristics of true love?
11. What does the song "We Found Love" teach young people?

Questions, comments? Let me know. Email Fr. Mike