SORROW AND FORGIVENESS
The Gospel LUKE 17:3-4
[Jesus said,] “Be on your guard! If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he wrongs you seven times in one day and returns to you seven times saying, ‘I am sorry,’ you should forgive him.”     
The Media -- "Life After You" (Daughtry)
"Ten miles from town, and I just broke down; I’m out here alone just trying to get home to tell you I was wrong but you already know. Believe me, I won’t stop at nothin’ to see you, so I’ve started runnin’. All that I’m after is a life full of laughter as long as I’m laughing with you. I’m thinking that all that still matters is love ever after after the life we’ve been through, ‘cause I know there’s no life after you. It's hard to believe that a man with sight could be so blind. I must have been out of my mind, so I'm running back to tell you." 
Chris Daughtry and his band's song "Life After You" is a love song asking for forgiveness for a past action. He sings of making the mistake, and now he’s paying the price. He exemplifies what must happen in love situations: when you are wrong, admit it, and ask for forgiveness.

As we consider the Gospel passage together with Daughtry's song, we see two elements of the consideration of forgiveness. The one is the asking for forgiveness; the other is the granting of forgiveness. In the song, the man in the relationship begs for forgiveness, saying that he will do everything in his power just to say that he is sorry. In the Gospel Jesus exhorts his follower to forgive, even seven times--a perfect number in the Bible--and therefore, every time. In the song, we do not know whether his girlfriend forgave him or not.

Jesus gives the ideal; Daughtry's song gives reality. As Christians, we know how we should deal with others; the circumstances in real life may make the ideal very difficult to accomplish. In both situations, the follower of Jesus must strive for the ideal. Whether the person accepts the sorrow from another as he/she should, the person must say the words of sorrow, exactly what the man in the song did. But it cannot be conditional, that is, given only if the other will accept it. It makes no difference whether the person accepts the apology or not, it still must be said. Jesus exhorts the person to accept the apology and forgive, but it may not happen. Perhaps the hurt is too deep; perhaps it will take a lot of time to heal.

There are two questions for the mature Christian person here. And two difficult answers. First, can we bring ourselves to ask for forgiveness when we have committed a wrong against another? Yes, we should. And the second, from the receiving end, will we give the forgiveness? Yes, we should. People interested in Christian living must learn from Daughtry's song that they should ask for pardon when they have committed an offense. And they should learn from Jesus that they should give forgiveness all the time.                   
PRAYER
Good and gracious God, your Son calls us both to ask for forgiveness when necessary and to give forgiveness no matter what has happened. They are difficult lessons. We ask for the grace to learn them well. Be with us, we pray.

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GUIDE FOR CLASSROOM PRESENTATION AND PERSONAL ENRICHMENT

Theme:  When we make a mistake, we must ask for forgiveness; and when someone asks for forgiveness, we must give it.
 
THE GOSPEL
1. For Jesus, it is an act of love to “rebuke” someone, that is, correct someone who is a stumbling block for others. What is the best way to “correct” someone when you know that you are right?
2. It is very difficult to forgive another “seven times,” that is “every time.”  In terms of day-to-day living, do you think most people forgive another this often? Yes or no and why?
3. In terms of people who ask for forgiveness, what is necessary to show that they really mean that they want to be forgiven?
 
THE SONG
1. In the song, the lady in the relationship “already knows” that she has been wronged. Do you think that most couples are honest with each other?  Yes or no and why?
2. Analysis: “All that I’m after is a life full of laughter.” What do you want most in life? Why?
3. The man in the relationship seems to think that there will never be a relationship like the one he has. Most love counselors advise that there will always be other love relationships. Do you agree? Why or why not?
4. Text analysis: “I must have been out of my mind.” What are the reasons why people deliberately break up a relationship? When are the reasons good or bad?
5. What are the indications in a relationship that communication between the couple is good?
 
THE MEDITATION
1. Do most people who ask for forgiveness from another also give forgiveness to another? Yes or no and why?
2. The meditation says that even if one does not accept the apology, it still must be made. Do you agree and why or why not?
3. In your opinion, do most Christian people know the importance of asking and receiving forgiveness? Yes or no and why?
4. Is there ever a case where we should not accept forgiveness for a past action? Yes or no and why?
5. What does the song “Life After You” teach young people today?

Questions, comments? Let me know. Email Fr. Mike
©2007 Capuchin Province of Mid-America
Fr. Mike Scully is a member of the Capuchin Province of Mid-America