TGIMMheart

	THE FEAR OF FALLING IN LOVE

The Gospel

JOHN 13:21-30

Jesus was deeply troubled and testified, “Amen, amen, I say to you, one of you will betray me.” The disciples looked at one another, at a loss as to whom he meant. One of his disciples, the one whom Jesus loved, was reclining at Jesus’ side. So Simon Peter nodded to him to find out whom he meant. He leaned back against Jesus’ chest and said to him, “Master, who is it?” Jesus answered, “It is the one to whom I hand the morsel after I have dipped it.” So he dipped the morsel and took it and handed it to Judas, son of Simon the Iscariot. After he took the morsel, Satan entered him. So Jesus said to him, “What you are going to do, do quickly.” Now none of those reclining at table realized why he said this to him. Some thought that since Judas kept the money bag, Jesus had told him, “Buy what we need for the feast,” or to give something to the poor. So he took the morsel and left at once. And it was night.

The Media -- "Heart Attack" (Demi Lovato)

"Never put my love out on the line, never said 'yes' to the right guy, never had trouble getting what I want, but when it comes to you, I'm never good enough. You make me wanna act like a girl, paint my nails and wear high heels. Yes, you make me so nervous, and I just can’t hold your hand. You make me glow, but I cover up, won’t let it show, so I’m putting my defenses up ‘cause I don’t wanna fall in love. If I ever did that, I think I’d have a heart attack.”

The person in Demi Lovato's song "Heart Attack" knows that she must fall in love. Like most young people, she understands her desire to feel the romantic love of another person, a person with whom she can share her life. But it is a frightening feeling, a disturbing knowledge that she must open herself up to someone, give herself completely to that person, and accept the consequences of the decision. As she studies it, it seems like an attack on her heart, that is, a difficult decision involving love.

Judas, the son of Simon the Iscariot, had a similar feeling. He felt the attack on his heart when it came to love of Jesus, a person that he must have accepted as his leader at one time. His later actions show that he had not accepted him completely, but his immediate feelings concerning Jesus probably involved a desire to fall in love with what Jesus stood for, but a fear to follow through with that love. In more ways than one, it was "night" in Judas' life.

One of the foundational difficulties with growing up in our culture today is that young people must make very difficult decisions early in their lives. One of them is the decision to make a permanent commitment like marriage or the like, a commitment which will last throughout a lifetime. None of us know the future, of course, and therefore a commitment that will last must "cover" every situation that will happen in that future. It is indeed, as Demi Lovato sings, something that would cause our defenses to flare up.

It is actually good that we have this fear. In fact, many counselors advise that if we do not have this fear before the commitment is made, we should not make it yet. The fear should lead us to carefully make the decision of love. In the end, most of the people of our world will make a permanent commitment like marriage. Preparing for it may be scary, and the fear may be able to help us.

PRAYER

Good and gracious God, we want the feeling of love of you and other people in our world. It is a fearful thought to follow through with such a feeling because we do not know the future. Help us to learn the meaning of commitment and give us the grace to live it. Be with us, we pray.

+++++

GUIDE FOR CLASSROOM PRESENTATION AND PERSONAL ENRICHMENT

Theme: Falling in love may be a fearful act, but our fear can be good in the long run.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
1. Gospel text analysis: "Jesus was deeply troubled." Obviously, the betrayal of a friend is troubling. In your opinion, what were some other things that deeply troubled Jesus in his lifetime?
2. The presenter may want to make a presentation on "the disciple that Jesus loved." See footnotes in the New American Bible, and Catholic commentaries.
3. From your understanding of the Gospels, describe the character of Judas.
4. The lady in the song has not given herself in love yet, although she is coming close to it with her present friend. How does one really know that they are in love?
5. In our western culture, what does it mean to "act like a girl."?
6. How does a person "put up defenses" when it comes to love?
7. What are the most difficult decisions concerning romantically loving another?
8. Besides the thought of marriage, what other major decisions must a young person make early in life?
9. In your opinion, at what age should a person marry another? At what age should a person move into a serious commitment with another?
10. In your opinion, are the counselors correct when they say that if there is no "fear" before a person makes a commitment, then the person should not make the commitment? Why?
11. What does it mean to "follow through" with a love for God?
12. What does the song "Heart Attack" teach young people?

Questions, comments? Let me know. Email Fr. Mike