“After all the obstacles, it’s good to see you now with someone else, and it’s such a miracle that you and me are still good friends. After all that we’ve been through, I know we’re cool. We used to think it was impossible. Now you call me by my new last name. Memories seem like so long ago; time always kills the pain.” 

Jesus never spoke about past love relationships. He never had the occasion to give a high school or college course on discovering love and what it means in light of his teachings. Consequently, he did not speak about one of the most common situations that young people must experience as they grow, namely a romantic breakup.
 
It is generally known that people will not marry the first person that they love. Granted that there are a few exceptions, but for the most part, the fact means that people will have a “falling out” with people that they once liked, even loved. This is the definition of a breakup. Many times the breakup is hostile and angry, and burdens people for a long time.
 
Jesus may not have said anything about breakups, but he had much to say about forgiveness. In Mark’s Gospel, he even alludes to the fact that one cannot pray properly if such a person cannot first forgive. Such a directive would include people that we had a relationship with at one time.
 
In her song, “Cool,” Gwen Stefani presents the teaching of Jesus Christ in the setting of past love relationships. She gives the perfect picture of what should happen with regard to them. Singing about a past love relationship, she now says that her relationship with her once-upon-a-time boyfriend is “cool.” That is to say, in terms of Jesus’ teaching, she and he have forgiven each other of anything that happened during their relationship, and now are ready to continue their lives while remaining friends with one another.                            

THOUGHT
 
PRAYER

Good and gracious God, we are people who choose who we are to marry. In that process, we learn that there are people that we no longer love, and perhaps no longer even like, and yet we have spent a significant time of our lives with them. Help us treat them and indeed all people with the respect that your Son has taught us. Be with us, we pray.

Questions, comments? Let me know. Email Fr. Mike

©2007 Capuchin Province of Mid-America
Fr. Mike Scully is a member of the Capuchin Province of Mid-America